Anecdotally Speaking

I love to use stories and anecdotes while I’m coaching.  I find it’s easier for me to communicate my point via stories and anecdotes.  This is probably the case because I am a visual learner, and being able to envision and imagine a story helps me to get my head around concepts.  Here are some DOs and DON’Ts I’ve found helpful while using anecdotes and stories for training.  These help you avoid looking like a cheeseball, and keep your audience focused on your message rather than on making you look better.

DO use them
Even if you aren’t the type that needs anecdotes are stories to grasp concepts it doesn’t mean that your audience couldn’t use one.

DON’T always use personal anecdotes as examples of how to be a success
If you talk about yourself only as a winner people will start to see you as needy, and it may affect your credibility.  If your ego needs stroking then you probably need to address that issue separately from your coaching sessions.  I’ll talk about successes from time to time, but I usually use failures and lessons learned from failure when I use personal anecdotes because those lessons usually were much more valuable than how I succeed at something.  Success may have been because I got lucky, and it had nothing to do with skill.

DO use other peoples’ stories
By using someone else’s story of success, especially someone your audience is familiar with and/or respects, gives your lesson a huge amount of credibility versus talking about you again.  There is also nothing wrong with attributing a success of yours to someone else associated with you at the time.  The important thing is to make sure your audience learns the lesson, right?

DON’T steal someone else’s anecdote or story to use as your own without crediting them
Doing this is a sure fire way to get nailed and look like a fraud.  Remember the DO above. It’s great to use other’s stories and experiences because it gives you credibility.  If you try to steal their story and someone finds out, you lose a ton of credibility.  It’s not worth it.

DO be pointed in your approach
When using anecdotes to train your people, or help them see a different way of looking at a situation, ensure that you aren’t just throwing out a story for the sake of storytelling.  Start by making your point, then use the anecdote or story to show an example, and finally ask your audience if they understand what you are attempting to convey.  By ensuring they see the point; you are doing your job as a manager.  Without the audience seeing the point, you’ve just told a story.

The moral of the story (pun fully intended) in the use of anecdotes is that the anecdote has to make the point and help your audience grasp what you are trying to train or manage.  Without their grasp of the lesson you’ve just wasted everyone’s time.  Always ask whether or not they understand where you are coming from after you’ve used the anecdote.  The dialog, brainstorming, and training really start after you’ve told the story.  Application of what you’ve coached/taught via the anecdote or story is most important.

What types of anecdotes do you like to use?  What are some other DOs and/or DON’Ts that I may have missed?